If you are in that mood where things are taken very seriously or in the literal, as we all do from time to time. Then you might not want to read this:

Often The Sardonic does not travel very well on paper (or the electronic version) as it often needs inflections of voice, expressions of face and hand gestures to let folks in on the act…

Anyway….

This is one of these posts I consider a public service, allowing the readers who are also writers and going through a desert patch to think:

‘Oh. Not just me then,’

OR

‘Wow. Glad I’m not like that. It can’t be so bad then,’

OR

‘Phew! Note to self. Must avoid doing this’  

OR

‘Yeh. It happens,’

I’m in a sulk. I shouldn’t be in a sulk.

All the rules integration intakes have been screened for comprehensive effective digestion and in consequence complete assimilation. My fatalistic mode has been checked and is fully operational. My realistic perception is working at maximum range all directions visual, temporal and esoterical. My hard truth review status is still supplying the correct and continually painful feedback. All four are in complete interface and co-ordination. All possible solutions and attendant stratagems have been produced and evaluated. There is, therefore, nothing to complain about.

Still in a sulk though

Practically speaking, that is.

The problem is, of course the Irrational. I shouldn’t be too hard on the Irrational, after all if it was not for The Irrational I would not be writing. After all, what is the point of sitting in one’s room rattling out narratives in defiantly independent mode and at times deliberately cutting oneself off from the outside literature on the basis it might interfere with your own work. How does that work? Uh? No….wait a minute….I ‘ve read that back to myself and it is certainly, without a doubt, quite and unarguably Irrational.

Now I lost the thread of the post due to a smallish soliloquy on justification…..Ah me.

Anyway, back to engaging the Hard Truth Review, just to get this done.

Sulk crept up…

So there I was, like a week ago, rummaging through the Audio Book online catalogue to see ‘wot was wot’ for the next purchase (Aside, I have become a dreadfully lazy and fidgety reader of paper and electronic equivalents, I need to listen as I rummage around doing chores and so forth).

‘You need to catch up on the Fantasy/Sci-Fi’ I told myself ‘Get yourself a breath of bracing and refreshing outlooks, see what’s going on down’ Oh dear that did not go well. It is possible being 68 and male has something to do with it. Not getting recognition by means magical certainly caused a huff to break out (I shall not include titles nor author’s names; offence will be caused to innocent readers) But a sample of the remarks went:

‘Not another unstoppable horde!’

‘A cruel king/baron/emperor? Well when you overthrow him in Book 5 set up a socialistic republic!’

‘Ok. Like who goes 60 million light years just to attack Earth and its piddly colonies?’

‘(Bad Word)! That’s my (bad word) ing plot! Awww (bad word) + (other bad words)’

‘Don’t get involved kiddos. Open up a tavern and fishmongers- it’ll be different’

And of course the very forlorn, self-pitying and irrational.

‘Why not me?????’

I stuck with some on my wish list, checked some of the reviews, which are usually very short and then ambled over to Amazon. Read one by someone who liked a certain book very much, immediately took a dislike to the book, the author (usually a favourite of mine) and the reviewer, vowed not to read the stupid book, as it was obvious every was only liking it because of ‘the name’. Indulged my sulk even more

Went to my fall-back search for history books as they can be a good source of inspiration, what with writing fantasy with political and military bits. I hadn’t realised exquisiteness of the sulk mode.

‘Read better books than that on the subject. What the (bad word) do they know?’

‘Not going to read any book by someone who writes well of (redacted)’

‘Yeah. Yeah. But they didn’t win that war. So who gives a (bad word)!’

‘Oh (bad word) not another conspiracy book about Pearl Harbour/ Kennedy/ LBJ (more bad words)!’

‘You can’t write about the German-Russian Front of WWII in a book that only takes 8 hours to narrate!’

‘Well there’s no point reading that since Trump got elected (more bad words)!’

‘Who gives a (bad word) about another book on Hitler?’

And so on….

As I was obviously determined to be insufferable and was just looking for reasons to be offended but was possessed of two credits to use on audio books I veered off into genres quite uncommon to me. Looked for something that was longer than 10 hours to listen to, did not involve serial killers, miserable self-absorbed jerks, some personality’s idea of humour or a cover that bears their grinning or alleged self-mocking face.

Found books with uncomplicated people, with ordinary problems (or maybe a modest government stitch-up without body count) which were resolved to a tidy and feel-good way and was thus satisfied.

At least they got me out of most of my sulk (but not the important bit)

I am still currently insisting being irrational about why I am not a success, despite all the reasoning arguments to the contrary. I have told myself I am being, aside from irrational, immature, unrealistic, self-pitying and a royal pain to myself and everyone else and shouldn’t be writing this post. I should be doing more marketing

I must dash off and get my own double copy available on Kindle

(and then I use more bad words).

And am therefore in an excellent to mood to write just as I durn well please, since….So What!

Oooooh…..The Sulk has gone away

Foot notes:

Any comments on marketing should be referred to another more mature and better informed site.

This post has been made possible by diligent years of training at and study of the challenging art of being grumpy with a sense of humour and perspective .

This should not be tried at home without the necessary tutelage and supervision in the early stages. Nor practised on widely used social media forums where high rates of mean spirited idiocy by folk devoid of any sense of humour will of course be encountered

and are a waste of an intelligent person’s time.

Let us therefore end on a soothing note

And I must be on my way……….