If you are in that mood where things are taken very seriously or in the literal, as we all do from time to time. Then you might not want to read this:
Often The Sardonic does not travel very well on paper (or the electronic version) as it often needs inflections of voice, expressions of face and hand gestures to let folks in on the act…
Anyway….
This is one of these posts I consider a public service, allowing the readers who are also writers and going through a desert patch to think:
‘Oh. Not just me then,’
OR
‘Wow. Glad I’m not like that. It can’t be so bad then,’
OR
‘Phew! Note to self. Must avoid doing this’
OR
‘Yeh. It happens,’
I’m in a sulk. I shouldn’t be in a sulk.
All the rules integration intakes have been screened for comprehensive effective digestion and in consequence complete assimilation. My fatalistic mode has been checked and is fully operational. My realistic perception is working at maximum range all directions visual, temporal and esoterical. My hard truth review status is still supplying the correct and continually painful feedback. All four are in complete interface and co-ordination. All possible solutions and attendant stratagems have been produced and evaluated. There is, therefore, nothing to complain about.
Still in a sulk though
Practically speaking, that is.
The problem is, of course the Irrational. I shouldn’t be too hard on the Irrational, after all if it was not for The Irrational I would not be writing. After all, what is the point of sitting in one’s room rattling out narratives in defiantly independent mode and at times deliberately cutting oneself off from the outside literature on the basis it might interfere with your own work. How does that work? Uh? No….wait a minute….I ‘ve read that back to myself and it is certainly, without a doubt, quite and unarguably Irrational.
Now I lost the thread of the post due to a smallish soliloquy on justification…..Ah me.
Anyway, back to engaging the Hard Truth Review, just to get this done.
Sulk crept up…
So there I was, like a week ago, rummaging through the Audio Book online catalogue to see ‘wot was wot’ for the next purchase (Aside, I have become a dreadfully lazy and fidgety reader of paper and electronic equivalents, I need to listen as I rummage around doing chores and so forth).
‘You need to catch up on the Fantasy/Sci-Fi’ I told myself ‘Get yourself a breath of bracing and refreshing outlooks, see what’s going on down’ Oh dear that did not go well. It is possible being 68 and male has something to do with it. Not getting recognition by means magical certainly caused a huff to break out (I shall not include titles nor author’s names; offence will be caused to innocent readers) But a sample of the remarks went:
‘Not another unstoppable horde!’
‘A cruel king/baron/emperor? Well when you overthrow him in Book 5 set up a socialistic republic!’
‘Ok. Like who goes 60 million light years just to attack Earth and its piddly colonies?’
‘(Bad Word)! That’s my (bad word) ing plot! Awww (bad word) + (other bad words)’
‘Don’t get involved kiddos. Open up a tavern and fishmongers- it’ll be different’
And of course the very forlorn, self-pitying and irrational.
‘Why not me?????’
I stuck with some on my wish list, checked some of the reviews, which are usually very short and then ambled over to Amazon. Read one by someone who liked a certain book very much, immediately took a dislike to the book, the author (usually a favourite of mine) and the reviewer, vowed not to read the stupid book, as it was obvious every was only liking it because of ‘the name’. Indulged my sulk even more
Went to my fall-back search for history books as they can be a good source of inspiration, what with writing fantasy with political and military bits. I hadn’t realised exquisiteness of the sulk mode.
‘Read better books than that on the subject. What the (bad word) do they know?’
‘Not going to read any book by someone who writes well of (redacted)’
‘Yeah. Yeah. But they didn’t win that war. So who gives a (bad word)!’
‘Oh (bad word) not another conspiracy book about Pearl Harbour/ Kennedy/ LBJ (more bad words)!’
‘You can’t write about the German-Russian Front of WWII in a book that only takes 8 hours to narrate!’
‘Well there’s no point reading that since Trump got elected (more bad words)!’
‘Who gives a (bad word) about another book on Hitler?’
And so on….
As I was obviously determined to be insufferable and was just looking for reasons to be offended but was possessed of two credits to use on audio books I veered off into genres quite uncommon to me. Looked for something that was longer than 10 hours to listen to, did not involve serial killers, miserable self-absorbed jerks, some personality’s idea of humour or a cover that bears their grinning or alleged self-mocking face.
Found books with uncomplicated people, with ordinary problems (or maybe a modest government stitch-up without body count) which were resolved to a tidy and feel-good way and was thus satisfied.
At least they got me out of most of my sulk (but not the important bit)
I am still currently insisting being irrational about why I am not a success, despite all the reasoning arguments to the contrary. I have told myself I am being, aside from irrational, immature, unrealistic, self-pitying and a royal pain to myself and everyone else and shouldn’t be writing this post. I should be doing more marketing
I must dash off and get my own double copy available on Kindle
(and then I use more bad words).
And am therefore in an excellent to mood to write just as I durn well please, since….So What!
Oooooh…..The Sulk has gone away
Foot notes:
Any comments on marketing should be referred to another more mature and better informed site.
This post has been made possible by diligent years of training at and study of the challenging art of being grumpy with a sense of humour and perspective .
This should not be tried at home without the necessary tutelage and supervision in the early stages. Nor practised on widely used social media forums where high rates of mean spirited idiocy by folk devoid of any sense of humour will of course be encountered
and are a waste of an intelligent person’s time.
Let us therefore end on a soothing note
And I must be on my way……….
Gosh Roger … might I guess from this that you were/are in somewhat of a sulk then? The subtlety made it difficult to tell, for sure. 😄 And with that said, I can relate … perhaps not today, but most days, although for different reasons. So … I have no sage or profound advice … take Sheila away for the weekend next weekend … go someplace fun and/or peaceful. 🤗
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Not to worry Jill. 🙂
I was just going through one of the regular Writer’s ‘Oh Woe Is Me’ phases which come in all shapes and sizes (ask any writer). 😪 😫
So I started writing, for writers, then it went off on tangents and I started to have fun with images…..😉
Annnndd ended up poking fun at myself, some of the images which were originally produced for serious purposes, and some of the knots writers can get themselves into.
Worked off some steam and footled around with WP’s systems.
All good fun 😄
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I figured as much! 😉
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I think I might just do a few more posts in this style 😉
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Go for it! I’ve still got to go back and catch yours from last week … I got so overwhelmed last week that I barely found time to come up for air.
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Take time out Jill. Pause for breath, coffee and suchwhich
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A cuppa coffee is never far from my hand, nor are the smokes, but food and air are another matter altogether!
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Have they found a way of selling air to you guys? 🤨
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Hadn’t you heard? We all now have to wear these monitors that measure how many breaths we take, and at the end of the month, they send us a bill for our air consumption. Each breath costs only a fraction of a penny, but it adds up … my last bill was over $100. I tried disputing it, saying that the quality of the air was poor and therefore the breaths had less value to me, and I had to take more of them, but … in the end, I had to pay the bill anyway.
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There are SF writers who would be very pleased to get the outline for that Jill. 😃
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Funny, isn’t it, that what is sci-fi at one point often becomes reality later on. Let us hope this one doesn’t!
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Possible story line:
If the deniers have their own way- The air becomes very polluted and the life expectancy of folk decrease; even with respirators
‘Happily’ for the rich and the influential they can get supplies of clean air for their homes and for ‘jaunts’ into the ‘Outside’.
The story revolves around one of the many gangs of ‘bootleggers’ who sell supplies of ‘fresh air’ (think of bathtub gin) on the cheap to ordinary folk.
Possible comedy or grim story; currently viewed as a satire and not a prediction (hopefully)
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Yeah, like Canadian beer advertised as brewed from clear mountain spring water. Speaking of the breathable air scenario, go back in time and watch the movie “Spaceballs” again. The point is comedically made about the destruction of a planet’s air supply.
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That’s where I got the idea from!!!
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Well there you go, amazing where ideas can come from!
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Yep.
Just a question of keeping tuned in to the Universe.
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Won’t let me leave a “like” so here’s a “like” just for you, Roger. And guess what, what worked yesterday after my long “talk” with WP… doesn’t work again today. If I’m going to stick this out with WP, I need to learn Zen or some deep, deep meditation process. I need to forget everything I know, or think I know; I need to enter into the Twilight Zone and imagine the unimaginable; I need to find the answer to the Universe’s reason to exist and whether it is aware of my presence in itself and if that presence is a necessary part of its functioning; I need to accept the fact that there are countless ways for the System to torture individuals and that mental torture caused by AI (Absolute Idiocy) has to be faced. Back to that circled question at the bottom right of the screen…
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Hmmm … not a bad story line, albeit the stuff that nightmares are made out of. Perhaps I’ll take the ball and run with it. Who would have thought, 30 years ago, or even 10 years ago, that breathable air would be a commodity to be traded on the black market.
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SF writers.
When I was 15 I read stories which covered:
1. Pocket calculators.
2. Surrogate mothers.
3. The speed of social media and life
Quite some vision back in the 1960s.
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Indeed so! And, remember Buck Rogers? And Star Trek and the Starship Enterprise … now known as the ISS, International Space Station?
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Their problems were as nothing in comparison as ours in trying to get WP to work
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True. 🚀 Beam me up, Scottie 🌌
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‘The WP engines can’ae take it cap’n!’ 😱
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NOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooo
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Fear not.
I will transcend unto another realm from whence I will continue despite the vagaries of WP.
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Ah, the Writer’s Woe-is-me Syndrome. I know it well. I admire your way of coping here, and all those pictures of dudes in various throes and outfits, some elegant, some eccentric.
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Thank you Audrey.
I was one of those time-honoured ‘huffs’, (as you do) but couldn’t just grumble. I had to stick my tongue firmly in my cheek and have a lot of fun, a lot of it at my own expense.
There’s quite a collection of such pictures gathering on my ‘Media’ file. After all, we can’t have too much repetition.
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This is highly inspirational, Roger. I’m now all fired up to write a blow-by-blow account of the replacement of my downstairs toilet this coming week.
“It didn’t start with a leak, although anyone could be forgiven for believing that a leak was responsible for the ensuing mayhem and drama. Actually it was the owner’s belated realization that the bowl was stained beyond redemption, and also that modern toilets use much less water in their flush cycle. So the dreaded call to Acme Plumbing was made and…” See? nothing to it, and people will line up to read this flushing crap, at least until they realize it’s not a link to a YouTube video on how to replace a toilet. All a matter of presentation, and yes, marketing!
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Good start there, holding the reader with anticipation as to the unfolding drama (replacements of any large household item has bound to have drama).
Proud to have been inspirational and looking forward to reading the entire story.
As you say marketing and presentation, twin gods of the modern pantheon.
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Some people really don’t take heed and put it all out on social media, they really need to read this 🙂
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Thanks Simon 😃.
Some might say I had too much flippant fun with that, but as I see it….If a writer takes themselves too seriously in all aspects and all times……. ‘it an’t gonna happen’😉
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Yeah I get ya 🙂
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😄
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