Ok I’ve visited this screwy site before. What the hell is going on now?

Oh fair maid. Have you not heard the gladsome news? Copies of have been sold (ed). And that is the Marketing Team doing their celebratory dance.

Sales! It’s time to organise a Focus Group for the next Marketing Campaign

It’s being organised! Get a chance to air your views on an issue of The Day…Step this way folks. Step this way 

…Layyyydeeez and Gentle-MEN. You are asked(ed) to discuss THE weighty matter of this TOME before...you.

….Available on Kindle…..

WHAT is YOUR general O…pin…nee-onn?

…Ehhhh..It’s a book…And it’s ’bout three girls and it’s got lotsa words. Ders no pictures though. I thought if it wuz ’bout girls it should be a comic book, so we can see what they’s wearin’. Y’know.

Awww. I mean that’s like a load man! Y’know. I mean it’s all about the narrative, dude, which is basically an elevated intrinsic examination of the journey undertaken by the soul. I mean, like you don’t need pictures man. None of that postmodernism crap, neither. You know what I’m talkin’ about there man.

Fearfully contrived if you ask me? What say you Carruthers?

Contrived ye say? Do ye? Ye insult a fellow with a wooden leg would ye*? By the time I’m finished with ye. Ye’ll be only fit for Davy Jones’ cabin boys..Arr-Harrr!!

• * This colourful fellow above is referencing Captain Dekyria…Arketre Beritt’s commander and mentor.

Oh please! Like it’s a book whose central characters are women and you’ve got male yo-yos leading on Focus? Gimme a break.

Hearts of gold and inseparable friends. How very dull…..But they did massacre some men…..Yes but those were so second-rate villains, I mean talk about target practice.  

Naw! It wuz irritating. All these women being clever and brave! It’s not like that in real life. You gotta wise up! It’s all wrong giving women all these role models roles! Ya…..

  It’s ok sisters I stuffed his head down the john and slammed the seat on his neck….he’ll be there for a while…..Carry on, girls.

Yes…It’s quite nice…I think it’s a bit of a sleeper. Low-key marketing is the best ploy (I’m gonna steal the plot and get it up and out there! He knows ‘jack’ about social media networking,)

 

O-M-G!!

Annddd lil’ Miss Clickbait is next.

Why did the blonde haired one end up having the nick-name ‘Flaxi’. If it gets to be a best seller, it’s what all the jerks in the office are  going to start calling me.

Yeah….Frankly……Like that’s gonna happen.

Did you know about this?

 

 

No…And I was so happy with the two sales. 

Fear not good sir…I shall sally forth with the news of this tome…..See how I do fly to the crowds….

Or were they this way?….

Well thanks for your input folks….the Focus Group is now closed.

Anyone else you want me to use as a sink plunger?

At your own discretion thank you. If anybody wants me I’ll be under the kitchen table.

I warned him. Lord knows I’ve warned him. How many times, did I warn him. Don’t market.

Come, come m’dear. There’s no such thing as bad publicity.

Oh by the way I seemed to have misplaced an associate of mine – here’s her picture

Oh yeah….I saw her….. Asked me to pass a message on. She thinks Marketing and Publicity isn’t for her….She’s taking up a trade in plumbing.  

Just for Marketing and Giggles- The British Approach

 

Just for Marketing and Giggles- The Good Ol’ Hard Sell Approach.

Just for Marketing and Giggles – The Greek Tragedy Approach

Just for Marketing and Giggles -The Vaudevillian Cross-Talk Approach