Tag Archives: Word Press

Oh Gladsome Day!!

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(Should be played throughout the post for the full esoteric and joyous effect)

Oh joy of joys!

Let there be singing and dancing in the streetsdancingmania

and the villages, for thanks be to Chrome

I can now communicate on WordPress without fear of being a Non-Person. For Google did lifteth the scales from my eyes and did show unto me that MSN was a false prophet whose browser was filled with much evil miasma and thought crimes

Ahhhh Goodly Blessed Programmer of Google Chrome

Big-Brother

How wonderful of you to care for me so.

For all I needed to so was sign a long and obtuse document put together by the caring lawyers

dr-faustus-paul-rainer

of Great Google and download a whole slew of necessary stuff

 

I am so very, very happy

cartoon-boy-doing-a-happy-dance-by-toonaday-6279

Join with me ye Word Press

WP!!! What the ffffffffffffoolsihness are you up to now??????

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and sing praises wondrous to

Chrome Happy Face

 

Sarcasm

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Thought For The Day…..

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If you are in this state of mind……….

Plot Image 1

“I do like my computer, I trust Microsoft to do the very best for me with its upgrades and I think that every site especially Word Press, FaceBook , Yahoo, Google, and Amazon to name but a few have me, my mental welfare  and my experiences and a trouble free way of working uppermost in their minds.

I am content that in the future I will trust everything they do.”

Either you:

  1. Do not use your Computer very much. But soft
  2. Need to check the contents of those new vitamin pills you are taking. 1
  3.  Should stop using your device for a day or two and let the subliminal messages wear off. Tricycle 2
  4.  Could ask a good friend or near relative to use theirs on your behalf and not to pay attention to the language they use when doing so.sturm_drang3
  5.  Might consider relocating to a log cabin, remote cottage or abandoned lighthouse and living a simpler life.Processed with VSCO with b3 preset

Failing this you should ask someone to empty of bucket of ice-cold water over you so you come to your senses enabling you to do like the rest of us….. scream, swear and threaten physical violence

Melodrama

or

Barbarian Woman Warrior

upon the computer systems and sites sundered & various.

And never forget there is always the good old, dependable

Big Raspberry

 

 

 

Word Press Why Do You Haunt Me So?

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Pause for Thought

Word Press. A minute of your time dear ladies and gentlemen.

WIN_20190804_08_40_41_Pro

Why do you send me a link to the post I have posted up? Why do you think I need to know what I have posted? What would you do if I were to ‘like’ this?   Laughing and pointing

 

Huh?

 

I have been very patient about this matter, and will continue to be bemused because this quirkiness provides me with much material for blogs posts, that are quick and easy to produce and thus give the impression how buzzy (sic) I can be.

writer-2

I consider myself fourtunate I have opted for a free plan and do not rely on my welfare and income hereabouts……

But have others ources.

But soft

On the whole I find the whole business most singularwilliamterriss7-2

Ah well, I have said my piece, I must be on my way

Whimsical one

Four volume novels don’t write themselves y’know

The Precipice Dominions

The Precipice Dominions

fed_up_woman-620x412….. I knew he’d do it! Him and his cheap marketing…it’s an offence to business practice I tell you! (And he doesn’t get the %@*! spelling right sometimes)

PS: Addressed once before, How Existentialist Can You Get?

But poking WP’s foibles is such fun!

How Existentialist Can You Get?

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According to the WP information I started this blog on the 26th July, which is very reassuring that WP has acknowledge my existence since on the first attempt (1 hour before) it lulled me into a sense of false security by setting up a site and then denying such a site existed, even if you could type in the address on a Google search.

BUT that is cyber water under the programmed bridge let us not dwell on it…..I’ll just mention it through snarky teeth, from time to time. ….. WP…….  big-raspberry

 

However it is nice to be back amongst the WP friends again and for them to ‘follow’ me.  11 of them, so far…..

But soft But soft…..The statistics (all hail the Grate(sic) God Stats). Do they not advise me there are 12 followers?….Ah, check I must, who is this shy and timorous creature who follows and yetR_Staines_Malvolio_Shakespeare_Twelfth_Night does not contact me?

Whaaaat?

Puzzled expression

It’s me!   WIN_20190804_08_40_41_Pro

I’m following me?

Wow, that is so…..

Isn’t it just?

But how can it be that a computer system decides I have to follow me? I mean, I have a fairly good recollection of what I have written (well in the last few days). Where in the programme is the rational that a blogger must follow themselves.

This of course explains why my posts keep turning up on my ‘Reader’ and whereas it is very tempting to ‘like’ them…Well that would be cheating, and I don’t want to end up doing that, I mean where would it end?

Yes, I know Number 10

However back to the subject matter.

How can it be that a computer system let’s you do this, or more to the point encourages you to do it? Because I do not recall making anything like a conscious choice. The evil little programme just picks up on a wandering spasm in the brain, or a few fat fingers and there you are.

Following yourself?Laughing and pointing

I would delete ‘me’ as a follower, but if I were to do that, would that mean a denial of one’s self as a being? Would one be in danger of eradicating oneself from this plain of WP existence? Or, as it were make a statement that one should not be here, for fearing that following oneself is something narcissistic? Brexiteer

There again does this leave me open to the charge of being so fragile that I fear the act of even deleting something so tenuous and ephemeral as a ‘following’ status on WP? Am I thus without the fibre which encourages the growth of character and independence? Whimsey 5…..

Ah me……

Melodramatic man

T’would that the answer be simple, thus….therefore

There again, perhaps it is best to leave the whole thing alone in case WP has another hissy Angry cat 2 fit and wipes out my whole blog !

And we read that AI might take over the WorldAre you serious

 

 

 

 

So just keep a look out, and if anyone does notice me replying to myself…..I have a FaceBook page and my wife and children can be contacted through there.

The Smidge of Arrogance (A post revisited….and revised, a smidge)

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If I was a very popular blogger beloved by millionsvghkRUl7_400x400

…… No, that’s freaky……I’ll start again….

Idiot man 2As you know, WP and Akismet once decided I was Spam (You guys up there in Cyber-City…… I am never, ever gonna let that go) and I decided my whole blog had to be consigned to cleansing flame 250px-Fire_whirl_(FWS)_crop That might be a tad dramatic, but I love the image…..

Anyway now I am back I thought I would rummage through a few of the old posts (tip: Keep your stuff on a Word Doc….you never know when…..) and, y’know Copy & Paste them….I mean like…who is gonna remember ?fed_up_woman-620x412

 

 

 

I do...…. (Oooh, there’s always one, isn’t there?)

Anyway… This was a post from 2018 which was all about the need to have that Smidge of Arrognace to get you started or keep on going…..I’ll let it explain itself (with editorial alterations)

“Average Body Weight 60,000 grms

Average zinc content in body 2 grms

Percentage of zinc therein = 0.00333% per body (one three-thousandth).

Yeh, that’s an estimate of how much zinc your body needs, scientifically the figures might be slightly off, but you get the idea……Not a great amount, but it’s vital, otherwise, things go wrong. Also, too much and things go wrong. You need a smidge…a very, very, very small smidge, but you need it.

Bit like something you add to a meal, if it’s not there, it’s bland maybe, if you put too much it…..Hello waste bin…..

‘So prithee dear blogger’, you ask me

werke_321_orig

“Hey!!…..You do not normally post up tips on health or cooking. What the frib goes on here?”

Bear with me here, hear me out.

 

A scene at the ‘desk’ (allegorical) of a writer……

sturm_drang2

“Oh what is the point of it all?”

You know how it goes don’t you? Consider the following:

You put down the latest well-selling book…..OR…..Sitting there reading someone else’s erudite or inspiring or funny or informative blog post and even worse when they combine them some or all together, and you wonder….’Oh what have I got to offer? I’m like ….blaahh-city!’

OR……

A part way through your book or short story and you start to slow down or notice on a re-read that the continuity is all skewed OR the main character is as fascinating as a small piece of cardboard, in fact you reckon the cardboard is more interesting. You are there thinking ‘why am I bothering, I just don’t have it! I am just less than the dust beneath the chariot wheels of other writers….Oh (you say once more) WOE (or any other word you care to use).

OR…..

you get up OR sit down and think ‘Aww. Why bother! There was no great response to my last effort and I followed all the marketing tips…Let’s face it, I’m a nothing-writer. Who cares! (At this point you may well stick your tongue out at the latest best seller by someone you normally like, but today…..Hufffffffff!!! And foreswear never to read a book again because they only remind you of your own let-downs. You’ll buy boxed DVD sets series 1-15 of something and binge watch)

It happens folks. Doesn’t it?

And we all wonder just what can be done about it. Because we do so love to write, we do so want to be read. We have something to offer.

The Arrogance of such a thought…..Really?

This is where in comes the smidge. The very, very small pinch of Arrogance. That little piece of flint which sets off the spark for the writer to try one more time, and the time after that, and after that and just never give up.

Because you can! Because YOU have something to offer.

Let me just elaborate on this notion and bear in mind this is to illustrate just where the smidge comes in.

I write fantasy, I read fantasy.

Joe Abercrombie is gritty, this is the world big warts and all. His continuity is superb, a minor character is one book is central to another, the background from one book to another align. The action scenes are gory but so well choreographed! His characters are alive.

Q: The Smidge….

‘Haven’t they got their own swear words in this world Joe? I mean like what’s with this old goat having everything as part of his cunning plan, like not new & squaresville man. Where’s the chaos? Where’s the variety in the language. Uhh I got my own views. I’m gonna give that genre my own shot.’

Annnnddddd……

Brandon Sanderson creates whole worlds with their own science in the Mistborn, and an encyclopaedia of characters who flit in and out, have their own vital parts in the plot, no one is wasted. How could I complete?….But soft, who is that knocking on my door of creativity

Q; Smidge

‘Yeh that was fine Brandon. But Stormlight and the Way of Kings, I’m there saying ‘Get on with the plot, the guy is down a big hole and trying to inspire a bunch of other guys, I get it….What about the pacing!..I can wrap up a tale quicker than that..note to self- when writing vol III of  my series, don’t do a Way of Kings on the readers.’

Frib!(shameless plug…read about this and other fascinating words used by characters in The Precipice Dominion series….. available on Amazon Kindle…. terms and conditions apply) ) You say, that sounds like sour grapes and suchwhich. I reply…..No, that is the Smidge speaking, it is that which drives me on. The danger would be to lambast everything Abercrombie and Sanderson do just because I targeted on a few little facets which jarred with my style for I reckon I can write without those….

I…. reckon…..I can write……

And there you have the explanation dear readers/writers, the smidge is enough, just enough to get the words flowing. Any more and you will be sour, bitter and getting nowhere apart from joining the breed who scratch out 1 & 2 star reviews on Amazon because they can’t write and have a pathetic deluded ‘Kritik’ kick going in their own sad dusty little world.

There is one other smidge you should add to Arrogance and that is the Wry Smile.

Jeremy Corbyn How does that work……Oh wierd one?

Glad you asked Jeremy….

You can enjoy those works by succesful authors and still pick holes in them. Do not be angry,  and let jelousy seep in. Just be at one with the belief- no writer is 100% perfect. Therefore you can offer your own take in your own work and you are going to show the world. Never mind who says what……. It does not matter….. You…. ARE…..

Yes…You ARE A WRITER and let no one take this away from you. You have your own style, your own drive, your own images.

Repeat to yourself, without any doubt…

I AM

I WILL WRITE.

BECAUSE I CHOOSE TO.

Just that smidge folks.

Then get to work.

Good luck, and fortune to you all. You are worth it.”

The Return of A Writer (Still woebegone BUT Still Hopeful)

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An up-date.

Once upon a time there was a handsome prince……williamterriss7-2

Oooops, sorry wrong story. I get the two confused.

Anyway…..

Once upon a time there was a blog of an Heroically Bad Writer (ie his writing wasn’t bad, it was his approach to getting into print, it is a comi-tragic tale.) and over a few years he did pronounce on this and that, usually about writing, but sometimes politics…. the latter become its own blog Raging From the Lectern and all was well. He made many good friends and wrote back and forth between them and all was well.

Then sadly one day for no accountable reason which any person involved in the real world could figure out, the WP Spam filter decided to turn this writer into a Spambot and try as he might he could get no messages to his friends. When he spoke to those who were wise, learned and did oversee this world of WP they suggested he was doing something wrong and it was all his fault and told him to go away. When he didn’t go away they told him to speak with the Spam Filter. The Spam Filter spoke a language no normal person could understand but the gist was it did not see how the problem was theirs, and also told him to go away. The writer being Heroic, Stubborn and Opinionated said

 

Which was quite restrained considering the circumstances.

And resolved to wipe out everything he had done so the silly old Spam Filter would forget about him, and he, (being Heroic) would start again.

  • There was naturally much lamentation, but he was resolved(ed)

And thus now do I return…..

Undeterred with my trusty laptop, and latest spam-filter.

In the meantime I continued with my writing project available on Kindle Amazon

Set up its own little site….(not trusting WP since the first fiasco….)….…… https://5d1b3a122bbf3.site123.me/

And found on returning I am stuck with WP’s new format, which is not to my liking and seems to have been designed with ‘business’ in mind so I will have to preserve there, once I can work out what language masquerading as English is being used.

Mission Statement

Since it is now fashionable in the Western World to not use one’s Nature gifted senses, there will be no politics on this blog, since there are actually no politics worth discussing only populist claptrap, and one may as well talk to a big pile of ……. as try and get sense out of anyone embracing those creeds.

There will be posts about writing, writing and more writing. Such as motivations, approaches, styles, problems, ups and down and so forths…….

I will also be trying to catch up with all my good friends, but will have to do this slowly just in case Spam Filter decides all my activity is Spam.

It’s good to be back